There was that photo taken so long ago,
Joy of a Vegemite smeared face just so,
This is not the way that I wanted it to go.
Should’ve taken us away from day one,
Long before the harm to both was done,
I was scared, trapped and unable to run.
You were so little, when you saw my tears,
Worried, seeing the depth of Mum’s fears,
I still hear your words after all these years.
“Mum, Mum, Mum, I see you are crying”,
“I’m okay” I said, you knew I was lying.
Could you see how inside I was dying?
He took away all my dignity, all my hope,
The love of my son allowed me to cope,
My sanity balanced on a slim tightrope.
I got us away, but you felt in between,
The anger, the hurt, the things unseen,
A rift between us as you grew to a teen.
I’m sorry that I couldn’t give you a family,
That I parented you somewhat absently,
I wasn’t there when you needed me.
Maybe we’ll never get back what’s gone,
I wish I could change what was done,
I’ll always love you, my Vegemite son.