My Vegemite Son

There was that photo taken so long ago,

Joy of a Vegemite smeared face just so,

This is not the way that I wanted it to go.

Should’ve taken us away from day one,

Long before the harm to both was done,

I was scared, trapped and unable to run.

You were so little, when you saw my tears,

Worried, seeing the depth of Mum’s fears,

I still hear your words after all these years.

“Mum, Mum, Mum, I see you are crying”,

“I’m okay” I said, you knew I was lying.

Could you see how inside I was dying?

He took away all my dignity, all my hope,

The love of my son allowed me to cope,

My sanity balanced on a slim tightrope.

I got us away, but you felt in between,

The anger, the hurt, the things unseen,

A rift between us as you grew to a teen.

I’m sorry that I couldn’t give you a family,

That I parented you somewhat absently,

I wasn’t there when you needed me.

Maybe we’ll never get back what’s gone,

I wish I could change what was done,

I’ll always love you, my Vegemite son.